Paska
Guidance & Counseling (2020)

My Name is Paska and I live at Hati Suci Shelter. I was born in Jakarta in 2001. I currently study at Universitas Katolik Indonesia Atmajaya, majoring in Counseling & Guidance. I started studying in 2020. I’m so grateful because Heliconia would help me, so I can continue my education to a higher level, and I’m also very thankful to receive this opportunity by getting a scholarship, so my parents don’t need to worry about my tuition fee. I choose Counseling & Guidance major with a purpose because I want to be a teacher who creates good characters for the students and I want to finish my college within the regular four years. I want to prove to Heliconia that I can achieve my dreams.

My hobbies are watching movies about history and biography, I like singing too. At school, I practiced many things, I like to play basketball and I was chosen to be the captain. I can sing very well but I’m shy sometimes when singing in front of many people. I also can play guitar since I was in elementary school.

I have a simple family who lives in Tangerang, my father’s name is Hengky Sutanto, and my mother is Gwat Ing. My father only graduated from junior high school and my mother graduated from senior high school. To provide for my family, my father worked as a gas cylinder seller. He was patient, full of love, never give up, and willing to sacrifice, but three years ago, he passed away. When I heard that news, I felt so bad, because he left a substantial debt, while my mother only works as a housewife. My mother can’t work, because she has diabetics that cause her eyes to not see well. But my mother is a strong woman, she is patient, always praying, and loves her children. My parents have four children and I am the 4th child.

When I was a baby, my father had a plan to give me to the Priest at church, because at that time my family’s financial situation was very poor and he was afraid of not being able to pay for my life fees. But he was a very responsible father, so I was not handed over, but I was put in the shelter.

I was moved to the shelter since I was 5 years old. At that time, I did not know the reason why my parents put me in. I’m happy because I have many friends here. When I grew up, I understood why my parents put me here, they did not have enough money for my education, they were afraid I would be like them who only graduated from high school. They want me to get a better education and they hope that I can go to college. In the shelter, I have learned many things. I learned to be disciplined and grateful in life. Even though there were many unpleasant feelings, but I make them as experiences and life lessons to make myself better.

I am very grateful to God that I can get the Heliconia Scholarship to help me to continue my higher education. When I said to my family about this awesome news, they were very happy. They always pray for the best version of myself. I promise to myself, to the Heliconia Scholarship Foundation, to Hati Suci Shelter, and to all people who support me that I won’t disappoint them. I hope Heliconia can grow very well to reach more children to help their education.

 

Message from Paska, July 2022

I found it difficult in every semester of study, many challenges that are difficult to face, and I almost failed. However, I feel relieved and grateful to be able to finish this semester.

On February 27th, 2022, in the evening, I got sad news about my mother. I went straight to the hospital with my sister, and I cried on my way to the hospital. My mom has diabetes, which has spread to her eyes and heart, so my mother was unconscious. My older brother didn’t tell me that my mom was in the hospital for three days already, he didn’t want to make me worry. But unfortunately, my mom passed away. We immediately went to the funeral house. The next day, we had a mass before my mom was cremated. The next day, we came to the cremation ground to collect the ashes and scattered them into the sea as a farewell. I felt down and I didn’t want to do anything. But I was back to college because I’d been absent for three days. There were lots of help, prayers, and support from people around. I was very grateful. Thank you.

On March 25th, 2022, my older brother got married. Even though it was 49 days since Mama died, the wedding could not be postponed because everything was planned. We had prepared beautiful clothes for mama, but unfortunately, she was gone. The wedding went well with mixed feelings of sadness and happiness. Three months after my brother’s wedding, my sister-in-law got pregnant. I’m so happy and I hope my sister-in-law is always healthy.

I participated in LCC (Learning Counseling Club) at university. I became an LCC mentor for the class of 2021. All members were divided into six groups and consisted of six members in each group. We shared feelings, experiences, and knowledge about courses, lecturers, and study program activities with the new students.

On the 18th of June 2022, all Hati Suci children went to Dufan Entertainment Park together with the caregivers, we played together. I was so happy to go out and play together. It was tiring but made me happy.

Sincerely, Paska

 

Message from Paska, 2021

First, I want to thank the Heliconia Scholarship Foundation for giving me the opportunity to complete this semester. Although many challenges had to be overcome to get to this point, I believe that I can do it. Thanks to Heliconia, I was able to finish my semester well.

After completing the middle test, on November 20th, 2021, I got the opportunity to study at the university campus after so far I did online learning. I was so happy to meet my friends. But not all courses were taught in person, some courses were still online. I just realized that face-to-face lectures were very exhausting for me, I had to go to campus in the morning and then came back to the shelter in the afternoon. If compared to online classes, online classes are less rushed.

I was very happy because in December 2021 I had the opportunity to go home. I was able to meet my family and celebrated the new year together. On December 25th, 2021, I went to my father’s grave. I hope my mom is always healthy. I have not visited my father’s grave for two years. I love my father very much and I will never forget his kindness. Every Christmas holiday, I used to travel with my family and friends, but I had some assignments to do and needed to prepare for the final exam.

Sincerely, Paska

 

Message from Paska, 2021

First, I want to thank the Heliconia Scholarship Foundation for trusting me by giving me a scholarship. I’m so happy to study at Atmajaya University because I feel accepted as part of the Atma family and I am well received. Since Covid-19 spreads in Indonesia, all activities are carried out online until now. The situation in Indonesia is not going well. I’ve been studying online for two semesters, it’s difficult for me to get to know my friends, we can only communicate through social media.

In the shelter, we used to have activities every Saturday afternoon. Our activities are dancing and Kungfu. I join Kungfu. Our coach is very good and very patient in teaching us. However, at the end of May 2021, the activity was stopped due to the increasing number of covid cases in Indonesia.

This 2nd semester, I took classes from morning to evening. I learned how to do presentations with my group, and I also attended various campus seminars. Although those activities were carried out from morning to noon. Sometimes I got a little bored and sleepy, my eyes were tired of seeing the laptop screen every day.

I did well on the middle test. I learned together with my friends to prepare for mid-tests through calls in teams, we studied together every night. We helped each other and encouraged each other. Sometimes after we study together, we also share stories with each other.

On the 22nd of May 2021, my college friends and I went together to the Menteng area to get the vaccination. I got sick a few days after the vaccine. When I entered the final semester week, I was sick. But, I forced myself to take the exam. When I finished doing the exam, then, I took rest. I’m grateful that I can finish the exam well. I hope I get good grades this semester.

After the exam, I spent my time tidying up the wardrobe and bookcase. I also spent time exercising and playing together with my friends in the shelter. When they are bored, I invite them to watch a movie together on my laptop. I also hope that this pandemic will pass quickly and all activities can be carried out safely. I miss my family, I haven’t met them for more than one year. I also want to study and meet my friends at university.

Sincerely, Paska

 

Message from Paska, January 2021

First, I want to thank the Heliconia Scholarship Foundation for giving me the opportunity to complete the 1st semester. Although there were many challenges that must be overcome to get to this point, I believe that I can do it. I’m so happy to study at Atmajaya University because I feel accepted as part of the Atma family and I am well received.

After completing the mid-test, I still study online as usual. I got three difficult tasks that need to be done in groups. At that time I was very stressed and depressed, but I believed I could work it out by making an outline on a paper, so I made the background first to lighten the burden of work, then I discussed with my friends to do the assignments together in our free time. When the assignments were completed, I was very happy, so I could study to prepare for the final semester exam.

My class schedule was interrupted by the Christmas holiday, so we continued our lessons after the holiday. During the Christmas holiday, the children in the shelter and I played and prayed together. At the end of 2020, we celebrated New Year’s eve together, we grilled the fish, corn, sausage, and mushrooms. We had dinner together, and we sang songs together. We had a mass at 11 pm on New Year’s eve, but we were all too tired. We fell asleep, so we only prayed individually before we went to sleep. Actually, during the Christmas holidays, we were allowed to go home to visit our parents, but on the condition that we had to take a PCR test when we come back to the shelter. I prefer to stay in the shelter with my friends because the price of the PCR test is quite expensive.

Entering the year 2021, I studied to prepare for the final test semester which was held from January 14th, 2021 until January 24th, 2021. My friends and I gave encouragement and support to each other for the final semester exams. When the exam started, I was nervous and I was almost late. But I always set an alarm for the final semester test submission, so I would not late. It took a lot of time to work on the questions, but the time given was only two hours. I’m grateful that I can do everything to the end. On the last day of the final exam, I was a bit sick, but I insisted on taking the exam on the last day because I don’t want to take the remedial test.

During the covid-19 pandemic, I spend most of my activities in the shelter. I hope this pandemic will end soon, I want to experience studying in the classroom, and I want to meet my friends. I also want to meet my family, I miss them so much, it’s been a year I haven’t met them, I want to meet my mother. I can only wish the best for my family through prayer.

Sincerely, Paska

 

Message from Paska, November 2020

First, I want to thank the Heliconia Scholarship Foundation for trusting me by giving me a scholarship, so I can continue my education to a higher level. I’m so happy to study at Atmajaya University because I feel accepted as part of the Atma family and I am well received.

When Covid-19 spreads in Indonesia, all activities are online. In my first week in college, I took part in online campus introduction activities. I attended the online independence ceremony which was held by the university. From this event, I got new friends even though  I only know their names. We were divided into groups which were guided by the seniors, then we talked about our experiences in the Whatsapp group. The senior who led my group was so friendly, she trained us well.

My online learning was started on September  14th, 2020, I have eight courses. I felt a little bit awkward with my friends because there were two courses that were combined for the students from different faculties. There was a lecturer who gave group assignments and I did them together with my friends so we could get to know each other. Our presentation went well even though the internet connection was a bit slow.

I’m so happy because some of my classmates recognize me already, and we sometimes also had personal chats. My first friends are Meika and Grace, but I feel closer to Grace. I’m happy to have friends who know me well, even though we have never met before. One day I got messages from my friends, they invited me to visit their houses. But unfortunately, I couldn’t come because of the pandemic. I feel sad this semester because I can’t meet my new friends and I can’t be around the university. Online classes are not effective, because it’s hard for me to understand the material. There are some courses which are recorded and some are not, therefore students must really pay attention during class.

On November 5th, 2020, I had a mid-test. I studied the materials my lecturers had taught me from notes and recordings. The time when doing the exam was very short, I needed five minutes at first to download the questions from the lecturers. The mid-test gave me so much tension.

Before the test, my friends and I encouraged each other, I am so afraid of the results, I wish I will get good scores.

During the covid-19 pandemic, I spend more of my activities in the shelter. I often help my friends in the shelter with their homework, we play together, watch movies and tell stories. Every Saturday we do sports activities, such as basketball, badminton, and football. We miss our family so much, but we cannot meet them, we can only wish the best for our family. Our parents are allowed to visit us at the shelter, but we need to follow the health protocol. I hope this pandemic will pass quickly, so I can meet my family and friends. I wish I can back to study at the university.

Sincerely, Paska